Marjorie-Xian, the ancient city

Our days have been so packed full of activities that is it is difficult to keep track of what happened when.   I will try to recall as best as I can.   I will begin with our train ride to Xian yesterday morning.  It was cramped (4 people in a room the size of a hotel bathroom), it was smelly (I think someone urinated in it before we got there), it was uncomfortable (imagine sleeping on a wooden board), and it was a blast!  Yes, I said it was a blast.  Watching the lights of cities streak by and seeing the Chinese countryside from a train window cannot be replicated anywhere.   You get to see the rural China as seen by the locals.

     Once we arrived in Xian, we immediatly got off the train and walked through the very crowded train station to our bus. The stares we received from the locals made us feel quite uncomfortable.  I do not think they have ever seen interactial adoptive families before.  The staring at times got to be quite uncomforable and was down right invasive since we were constantly having our photos taken.  I mentioned in a previous post that the parents attended a citizen panel discussion.  At this panel discussion we discovered most Chinese people do not know that foriegners are adopting Chinese children.  There has not been anything in the Chinese media about it.  They were not only surprised by this phenomenon, but they could not understand why we would want to adopt a child, especially if we already have children.  They have been so indoctrinated with the idea of a one child family that they do not see any value in having more.  Through much discussion and answering of questions I think they finally understood that we truly love these children and consider them our own.

     Once in Xian we had a little down time, but soon the pace picked up again since we visited an art museum/studio.  There the children were able to practice calligraphy with an art professor from a nearby university.

Then were taken to the Wild Goose Pagoda.  There just happen to be a shopping center next to it and of course Malissa and I had to get some ice cream!  Doesn't matter where you go ice cream seems to follow us.  :)

In the 100 degree temperature we then climbed the ancient Xian wall that surrounds the city and flew kites.  There was not much wind so the girls did more running than standing in order to get their kites in the air.

Then today we ventured out to the Terra Cota Warriors.  What a sight!  There were 3 excavation sites and all three are active archelogical sites.  The story behind them is in 1974 a peasant farmer with a few other villagers were digging for a well.  When they got down about 3 meters they found a head looking up at them.  At first they were frightened but soon realized this was a valuable finding.  They reported it to the local authorities.  The farmer who was digging is now famous.  We even got to meet the farmer who is now an elderly man.  It is said if you shake his hand or get his signature you will have good fortune.  We got his signature so we are hoping much good fortune comes our way.

Also today we were able to visit a local school.  The poor students were out of school, but had to come back to meet us.  They did not seem too upset, though.  It was special because our girls and boy introduced themselves in Chinese, then the students introduced themselves to us in English.  Then each group sang a song to the other group.  

We ended the visit by giving them gifts that we brought from home.  Malissa passed out gem stones from Michigan to the students.  Each gem stone was put into a small envelope that was decorated by my 4th grade class.  You can see the boy in the foreground holding the manilla envelope.  

I think I have caught you up on all the activities from the last few days.  We are off to dinner now and exploring of the city of Xian with another family.  Tomorrow we will take a flight to Chengdu-the home of the Chinese Panda Preserve!   Until tomorrow...

Malissa-People, food, and trains

I've had a couple of exchanges between the people here. I've mostly been repeating, "Mei guo ren." That means "American." Our tour group draws a lot of attention; our group has gotten many weird looks and even stopped for pictures by the natives. Adoption is not common here in China but is starting to be more known. Causcasians are rare around these areas and are not commonly seen. 

The food is very good. We went to a place called Bellagio and got incredible dumplings. At a lot of places we've been eating there are lazy susans to pass the interesting dishes around. We've had a lot of rice, noodles, broccoli, unknown vegetables, chicken, pork, beef, Coke, water, and last night Peking duck. It was tasty; the duck tasted like chicken. I like trying these exotic, new, authentic Chinese food. 

Last night we rode in a sleeper train from Beijing to Xi'an.  Our little room held 2 bunk beds.  We shared the room with another mother and her daughter, Jana.  It was dark outside pretty much the whole time so we did not get to see much of the countryside.  This morning we saw a little bit when the sun began to rise.  We saw a nuclear power plant and lots of fields with corn.  There was also a lot of garbage thrown in piles along the railroad tracks.  

Marjorie-Waiting in the hotel lobby

We have officially checked out of the Hotel lobby in Beijing and are waiting to meet up with Danling, the    tour agency owner and director.  She will take the parents to meet with a citizen panel consisting of China residents while the children will be taken to another part of the hotel for a fun activity.  This panel was formed to allow us to ask them questions about China and their attitudes concerning adoption and the one child policy.  The children are not invited since Danling wants us to be able to ask questions without reservations.  It should be interesting.  If any interesting information comes up I will be sure to share it with you.

After the panel discussion we will have dinner with the group and then onto the train station.  It will be fun to pass through the countryside at night while traveling to Xi'an, the home of the Terra Cotta Warriors.  

Earlier today we had a blast riding rickshaws through the historical neighborhood of Hutong.  Hutong is a section of Beijing that takes you back to how China was earlier in previous centuries.

                                          (Yikes, my legs look scary white here!)

 Homes are basically a courtyard with rooms surrounding it.  We were able to go into one of the homes and eat a homemade dinner with dumplings.  The girls even got to make a dumpling.  

We also were able to climb a tower on the edge of the Hutong neighborhood that overlooked the city of Beijing.  This time I was able to make it to the top (as opposed to the Great Wall)!  The view was beautiful, especially since it was an unusually clear day with minimal smog. What was really neat was recognizing the places we had already visited such as the Beijing Olympic Park, The Forbidden City, and the mountains with the Great Wall winding through them.  

Marjorie-The Great Wall and Olympic Park

We started our day by riding on the bus to the Badaling section of the Great Wall.  We were told this was the most level section of the wall near Beijing.  The above photo was taken before the climb and we were thinking we had this in the bag.  We can easily make it to the top.  We chose the direction that was a little steeper since it had less people.  We began the climb with the backpack full of our supplies of bottled water, umbrella for shade, and of course the camera.  I found out I made several mistakes that day.  First of all, I wore opened toed sandals.  This was a mistake because a lot sections were so steep that you easily slide out of your sandals or when you slipped going down your toes would hit the uneven pavers.   Secondly, I carried a backpack that was about 10 pounds and every pound was felt in my thighs and lungs with each step.  And thirdly, I looked back at what we had already climbed and officially determined I am afraid of heights.  

Malissa, on the other hand, was full of energy and practically sprinted up the steps and slopes.  She surprised me.  Typically, she is the one who is afraid of heights and isn't too much into physical assertion.  She proved me wrong today.  Below is a photo of Malissa enjoying the climb in spite of the bird's eye view of the wall.  

Because of my insecurities, we did not make it to the top.  It was still a good climb, though, and a great memory was made with my beautiful Chinese daughter.  

Once we got back on the bus, it was then onto the Olympic Park in Beijing.  By this time the temperature had reached 100 degrees Fahrenheit and I was gulping down water by the bottle full.  Thinking I was well hydrated and ready to walk the level ground of the park to the Bird's Nest and Water Cube (where Michael Phelps earned his 8 medals) we set off.  It was only about a 10 minute walk from the bus, but the heat and exhaustion from the Great Wall climb was getting to me.  Once again, Malissa seemed to not be affected by any physical stress.  She complained about the heat, but it did not seem to damper her enthusiasm.  

When we finally reached the Bird's Nest and the Water Cube we just wanted to stand there in amazement.  The architecture and humungous size just takes your breath away.  Also knowing the Olympic athletes stood right where we were standing was humbling.  The two structures are right across a walk way from each other.  As we were standing gawking and taking photos, loud music began to play and in a sectioned off area of the sidewalk water began to spurt out of the ground.  Evidently, the water was sychronized to the music and a beautiful display of streaming water entertained us and the crowd around us.  Several of the girls stood next to the water and gladly got cooling spray on them. 

One last photo I have to share with you is the road next to the Olympic Park.  This shows you typical traffic in Beijing.  Every time we have been out on the road this has been the traffic pattern.  Quite often it is stop and go traffic.  Vehicles are constantly juggling their way into traffic with horns blaring.  I am amazed we had not witnessed any accidents, and I have great admiration for our bus driver.

Tomorrow is our rickshaw tour, citizen panel, and the overnight train to Xi'an.  I'll keep you posted!

Malissa-First day with the whole group!

Mom and I on Tiananmen Square in front of the Forbidden City.  A lot of people were staring at our group!  I think they were not used to seeing Chinese children with parents that were not Chinese. 

In the Forbidden City.  Today was a very hot day and water was a necessity.  It got as high as 99 degrees!

On the way out of the Forbidden City as we were walking to the bus,

 we came across a photo shoot of a woman in her wedding dress.  

These are the girls and the 1 boy who are on the heritage tour.  We are having a traditional Chinese meal.  We were told that we had to try to speak in only Chinese to our waitress.  

Tomorrow we are off to see the Great Wall!

Marjorie-Airplanes, little sleep, and smog

Well, we've made it to China!  Our flight was smooth and uneventful, but did not allow us to get much rest.  Malissa, who seems to be able to sleep anywhere, did not sleep much on the airplane. Maybe it was the excitement, easy access to endless movies, or the cramped conditions, but whatever it was kept us awake for most of the 14 hour flight.  We also lost 12 hours due to the time change so when we arrived we were exhausted.  As soon as we cleared customs, got our luggage, met with the RTTS representative, picked up another family from another part of the airport, and finally checked into the hotel, Malissa and I melted into bed and passed out.  

I woke up about 3:00 AM and could not go back to sleep, but Malissa stayed asleep until I woke her up around 6:30 AM.  From 3-6:00 AM I tried to access this blog to make a post, but I found it was blocked, as well as most other sites.  It seems China does not want to give me easy access to the internet.  I am not sure why I am able to access it now, but I am taking advantage of it while I can.

Today was very busy with touring.  Another family and us were given the opportunity to visit the Temple of Heaven and the Summer Palace.  Both were beautiful and full of history, but we think our favorite part was the Summer Palace.  The Summer Palace has beautiful gardens and buildings situated on a man-made lake that was the summer residence for the emperor and his family before the Cultural Revolution abolished the dynasty.  

The photo above shows a temple on top of the hill that houses a buddhist statue.  The emperor used to be carried up the steps to worship.  We, of course, had to climb the stairs ourselves.  It was well worth it, though, since the view was breathtaking up there.  

As you can see from this photo it is a breathtaking view, but the air pollution does not allow you to have a very clear view.  I can only image what it was like before the rise of industry and car use of the 24 million people who live in this city.  

Speaking of car use, the traffic here is horrendous.  It is nothing to take a couple of hours to get from one part of the city to another due to constant traffic jams.  When Mike and I were here 11 years ago the traffic was excessive, but at least about half the population was riding bikes.  Hardly anyone is riding a bike anymore.  It seems everyone now is driving a car.  We were told that the number on your license plate determines what day you can drive on--odd numbered plates on odd numbered days and even numbered on even numbered days.  I did see, though, both numbers today so I am not sure how strict that they are about it.  

We are loving the people watching.  There are so many people to watch!  The man in the photo above was practicing his character writing using a brush dipped in water.  The Chinese characters are so beautiful and graceful.  I am thinking this would be a good method to help my students learn to write in cursive!  One of the most interesting activities we witnessed were parents with signs in the park trying to find a spouse for their grown son or daughter.  Yes, you read that correctly,  The parents were match making with other parents.  I saw no grown children-only the parents with their sign taped to the sidewalk.  There were so many people that we could barely walk through them to get to the other side of the park.

Tomorrow we are off to Tiananmen Square and the Forbidden City, then shopping in the largest mall of Beijing.  Hopefully I will be able to get back onto this blog site to share some more photos.  

Malissa-our airplane

Marjorie-Ready to board the plane

Marjorie-Our Itinerary

Today we begin our journey back to China.  Here is our itinerary as sent to us by Red Thread Tour Services (a great heritage tour agency to work with if you are looking for one).:

Mon.  6/23	USA / Beijing  Take flight to Beijing
Tues.  6/24	Beijing  Arrive in Beijing. Pick up luggage, clear Customs meet RTTS representative and take a private van to hotel
Wed.  6/25	Beijing   Visit Temple of Heaven to interact with the local people’s exercise, and shop at Hongqiao Pearl Market  Touring in Summer Palace
Thur.  6/26	Beijing Touring in Tiananmen Square & the Forbidden City  Free time shopping in the largest mall of Beijing near your hotel    Fri.  6/27  Beijing  Full day excursion to the Great Wall  Stroll in the Beijing 2008 Summer Olympics park  Sat.  6/28  Beijing/ Xian   Visit Hutong neighborhood: Drum Tower and Shichahai Lake sights, travel by rickshaw  Make dumplings with a local family and enjoy a delicious home-cooked meal  Citizen panel  Overnight soft-sleeper train departure to Xi’an  Sun.  6/29  Xi’an   Arrive in Xi’an. Check into hotel City Wall tour, kite flying and optional bike riding on the Wall  Visit Shaanxi Art Museum, practice writing with brushes  Stroll at Wild Goose Pagoda Square for picture taking, explore the northwestern culture of China  Tang Dynasty dancing show

Mon.  6/30	Xi’an   Breakfast at hotel  Full day excursion to the Terracotta Warrior  Visit a elementary school & a jade factory
Tues.  7/1	Xi’an / Chengdu   Take flight to Chengdu  Arrive in Chengdu and check into hotel  Touring in People’s Park  Enjoy famous Sichuan Opera show
Wed.  7/2	Chengdu/ Guilin  Visit Chengdu Panda Preservation Center  Stroll at Jingli, the old Chengdu street, to see the traditional architecture  Take flight departure from Chengdu to Guilin Arrive in Guilin, check into hotel
Thur.  7/3	Guilin /Yangshuo/ Guilin  Full day cruise to Yangshuo  Free time for shopping in the famous West Street of Yangshuo
Fri.  7/4	Guilin   Tour at Reed Flute Cave, visit Tea House & enjoy the tea ceremony  Climb Fubo Hill for a panoramic view of the city  Take a night boat ride along the lakes
Sat.  7/5	Guilin / Nanning  Take flight to Nanning  Arrive in Nanning, check into hotel  Visit Guangxi Museum
Sun.  7/6	Nanning / Qinzhou  Stroll in People’s Park to interact with the local people’s exercise  Check-out then take a private van to Qinzhou.  Arrive in Qinzhou, check into hotel  See found place & city touring  Mon.  7/7  Qinzhou / Nanning / Shanghai  Visit the orphanage  Lunch with the orphanage directors then check out  Take the private van to Nanning airport  Take flight to Shanghai  Arrive in Shanghai. Check into hotel  Tues.  7/8  Shanghai   Sightseeing – Yu Garden, and the Old City God’s Temple area.  Candle-lit party for children  Attend the performance of a traditional Shanghai acrobatic show  Wed.  7/9  Shanghai / U.S.A   Check-out for airport  Take flight to USA As you can see our days will be filled with lots of activities.  That is why this blog will be good for us--not only will you be able to see what we are experiencing, but we can also better remember what we experienced when we look back at our tour!

Marjorie-Orphanage Feedback.

     In preparing for this journey our agency contacted the orphanage few months ago to let them know we wanted to visit, and to let them know what our questions are for them.  Questions we began with included:

• Was Malissa in foster care at all (a lot of the other families we originally traveled with were told their daughter was in foster care)?  
• Was there a nanny she was particularly close with in the orphanage?  
• Do they know specifically who found her at her founding spot?  
• What were her weight and height measurements her first year of life?
• What were her interests her first year of life?

Then at the end of April we were given the following information:

• She was never in foster care.
• The current director of the orphanage was the doctor of the orphanage when Malissa was there, and she remembers Malissa well.   She may be able to answer some of her medical information when we visit in July.
• She had a nanny who took care of her that is now the director of the children's department.  She will be at the orphanage when we visit so she can answer personal questions about Malissa when we visit.  She also remembers Malissa.
• They know the name of the police officer who took Malissa to the orphanage.

This bit of information led to a lot more questions from both Malissa and me.  Malissa wanted to know: 

• Why was she not placed in foster care?
• Was she healthy the whole time?  Was she not placed in foster care because she was ill?
• Was she left with anything (note, etc) when she was found?
• What was her interaction with the other orphans and her primary care giver?
• What were her interests and habits as an infant?
• Was there anything unusual about her (behaviors, birthmarks)?
• What room was she in?  We have some photos of rooms in the orphanage.  Were one of those rooms hers?

Questions I had included:

• When did she have her firsts: smile, words, rolling over, sitting up, steps, etc?
• Why did they name her Ke Xing?  We were told by the interpreter her name meant Brilliant Star, is this true?
• When we got her she had a scar on her ankle (it is still there) do they know what it is from?
• Why do they remember Malissa so well?  Was it because she was so cute and adorable? ;)
• Did she have a crib mate?
• Do they have information about specifically who found her at her finding spot?
• Can we meet the police officer who took Malissa to the orphanage?

     The reply we received from our agency stated that most of these will have to be asked at the orphanage so we were encouraged to print them out and take them with us when we visit.  Also, since then our agency's contacts in China have found the police officer, and if he is available he will be at the orphanage to visit with us.  

Marjorie-More photos from our first trip to China

This is our travel group about a day before we met our daughters.  This was taken in front of the Forbidden City in Beijing.  These were great people with whom to share our journey.  A few parents in this photo have passed away since-in remembrance of  Ron and Karen.

Our first morning together.  Getting ready to face the world together!

Another day in Nanning (the capital city of Guangxi where we stayed).  We had to take a picture here since Yao Ming was so well known in the U.S. at the time.

A week or so later we traveled to Guangzhou.  This photo was taken in the lobby of the White Swam Hotel which was where most adoptive families from America stayed .  Nearby is the American Consulate where we had to complete our paperwork to bring our precious babies home.

At the White Swan, Mike took Malissa for a swim in their beautiful pool.  Malissa loved the water!  She cried when we took her out.

Just before completing her paperwork at the American Consulate,  Malissa had a physical with a Chinese doctor.  She passed with flying colors!

All American babies adopted from China have the traditional Red Couch photo taken in the lobby at the White Swan Hotel.  These are all the girls who were adopted at the same time and place Malissa was adopted.  We call them her Chinese sisters.  Quite the active crew.  Malissa is the one tipping over in the very back!

Marjorie-Photos from our first trip to China

The day after we received Malissa, we went back to the Civil Affairs office to complete the paperwork that was required from the orphanage.  Here Malissa is being held by the head nanny.  We were told this was the nanny who named Malissa and all of the children who are initially enrolled in the orphanage.  As you can see,  Malissa is very content here (quite different from the night before since she cried nonstop until she fell asleep on the bus taking us back to the hotel).  She is even leaning into me as if she needed to feel me near her.  I tell everyone that the bonding for her began as soon as we started to feed her that first night.  She loved food, and anyone who was willing to give it to her. 

These two photos were actually taken by the staff at the orphanage.  We sent a disposable camera before we flew to China.  We received the camera back when we received Malissa.  We are assuming this is the room where Malissa slept.  If you look closely in the bottom photo (sorry it is so blurry-that is how we got it) it looks like there is more than one baby in each crib.   If that is the case, we hope to find out who was Malissa's crib mate when we revisit the orphanage.  Unfortunately, the orphanage in the photos above is no longer the same building that is being used today so we will not be able to visit this actual building.  We have found out, though, that a lot of the staff that was there are still present so we are hoping to meet most of them and thank them for loving and taking care of our Malissa.

The photo used for her adoption announcement was actually taken the night of "Gotcha Day."  After being fed and given a bath she fell fast asleep in Mike's arms.  She did not even wake up while we dressed her in her pajamas.   I love her sweet and peaceful face in this photo.  What an angel she was and still is today.  The love we felt for her that evening has grown exponentially.  I often tell people that the love a mother feels for her child is nothing compared to the love God has for each one of us.  It is difficult for me to fully comprehend that fact since my love for Malissa and all my children seems overwhelming.  

Malissa- Packing, Preparing, and Gifts

     One of the worst parts of traveling is the packing and preparing. Not only is it incredibly dull but somewhat labor intensive and long. You always seem to remember something you forgot, to do, or find right when you think you are done. For international travel the packing is an essential. The luggage has to be light enough to lug around, but big enough to fit a good bit of clothes. We both have matching hard, indigo blue suitcases for the journey. 

     We had to buy gifts for many people in China. My suitcase is packed with all the gifts because I was the one with room to spare. Go figure. We are taking gifts to China since it is culturally expected to give a gift if you are visiting a family. It's like in America- you would bring the host a gift. Small gifts like wine, flowers, tea, or some candies are ideal. Our agency told us you should never wrap a gift in white paper because white represents death in their culture. Red and gold are celebrated colors and therefore are best. If a Chinese person gives you a gift do not open it immediately unless they insist. We are giving gifts to a family we will be visiting and dining with, a small school, a citizen panel, a rickshaw staff (mode of transportation), my orphanage staff (nannies and director), and the police officer that responded to the call when I was found. We bought multi-vitamins (good vitamins are not commonly found in China), mini photo albums of me growing up, Michigan gemstones, and beef jerky sticks (another untypical item in China). 

     It took us a long time to find everything on our list. Camera, clothes, gifts, small toiletries, games to keep us busy on the really long flight, snacks (peanut butter, granola bars, candy) to satisfy our hunger, a first aid kit just in case, sunglasses/sunscreen to protect us for the bearing heat and hot sun, and hand sanitizer. 

Marjorie-The Rest of the Story

In my last post I began to tell the story I wrote while waiting to travel to China for our "Gotcha Day" with Malissa.  Here is the rest of the Many Red Threads story...

     By the time we got to the big city of Nanning (nah-neeng), I was exhausted.  I wanted to close my eyes in sleep, but the newness of everything kept me awake.  Along with the other babies and their nannies, my nanny carried me to a large room in the Civil Affairs building full of people with flashing cameras.  She walked to a tall couple, handed me to the man and woman, and said lovingly, "Baba, Mama"  (Daddy, Mommy).
     My new mother and father held me tenderly and cried tears of joy.  I was not a stranger to them because they had several pictures of me sent to them a few months before coming to China.  Mama whispered, "Wo ai ne," (I love you) in my ear and Baba gave me a kiss on top of my head.  My deep brown eyes looked curiously into Mama's blue eyes.  I had never seen eyes that color before.  I cried because I did not know yet Mama and Baba were attached to one of the many Red Threads tied to me.  Baba softly said, "Bie ku"  (Don't cry).
     They took me to our hotel room.  They fed a bottle to me, gave me a warm soothing bath, dressed me in soft pajamas, and sang quiet songs to me while holding me closely.  I soon fell asleep feeling comfortable and safe.
     A few days later we rode in a bus to another city in China called Guangzhou (gwahng-joe) to finish the necessary paperwork so I could become a United States citizen. Before I could become an American citizen I had to have a physical exam to make sure I was healthy, and Mama and Baba had to promise the government workers in the American Consulate they would always love and take care of me.
     Later that week we flew together in a big jet to America.  When we finally landed in Kalamazoo, Michigan we walked off the plane, and I met my two big brothers.  They passed me around lovingly with smiles in their eyes.  They called me "Meimei" (little sister) as they smelled my soft black hair, tickled the bottoms of my feet, and played Peek-a-Boo with me while riding in the car to our home.
     As time went on my family and I did everything together.  We swam in lakes and oceans, walked in the woods and mountains, played Hide-and-Seek and golf, celebrated birthdays and holidays, and cuddled quietly while reading books.  I learned how to talk like them, to walk, to eat on my own, and to make other people smile by me just smiling at them.
     My family also taught me about China and told the story often of their journey to me.  Before they even knew who I was they felt the tug of the Red Thread between us.  They knew they had to come get me.  They filled out dozens of forms, were interviewed many times by a social worker, had physical exams to make sure they were healthy, were even fingerprinted, and they waited a year and a half for the Red Thread to shorten.  They told me about the joyous day they saw my picture for the first time and the long plane ride to China.  I slowly began to learn that the Red Thread attached to my family would never break and remain strong forever.
     When I was old enough to go to school, my parents drove with me to meet my new teacher and classmates.  Some of the other children cried when the parents left, but I didn't.  Even though, I had never met the teacher and children before, they were not strangers to me.  I could feel the many Red Threads that were pulling me toward them.  Since the Red Threads of my past had drawn me close to those who loved me, I knew the Red Threads of my future would pull me towards those whom I would grow to love.
     Today I can feel many Red Threads attached to me.  Some of them are attached to people of my past such as my birth mother and nannies.  Some are attached to people from the present such as Mama, Baba, and my brothers.  But some of them are attached to people of my future that I haven't even met yet.  I wonder who those people are and when the Red Threads will untangle and shorten so I can meet them, too.

Malissa-Four More Days!

     Four days 'til we travel across the world. It's a 13-14 hour trip on plane, talk about jet lag. I heard if you sleep for most of it the jet lag won't be as bad. Sounds like I'll be catching up on my rest. We go west across the Pacific Ocean. It'll be hard to adjust to the varying time zone of 12 hours difference. We arrive earlier than most of the other families we'll be traveling with.
     The first day we visit the Temple of Heaven, an old place of worship to the gods, and the Summer Palace, a natural place with beautiful gardens. It'll be strange seeing the different culture carrying on around us. I hope to pick up the language more once we're there. It will be interesting trying the new delicacies, paying with the different currency, immersing ourselves in new perspectives.
     I'll miss my dad, but he'll enjoy this. After all he gets to eat the foods he likes, watch and play golf to his heart's content, and not clean up -that is until we get home.

Marjorie- How I dealt with waiting for two and half months to hold Malissa...

     Once I had seen Malissa's beautiful face and knew who she was, I had to find a way to bide the time without going crazy.  I decided to write a story about our adoption story and what could possibly have happened with Malissa her first year of life.  I thought this could answer a lot questions people kept asking...What did you have to go through to get her?  What happened to her before you got her? ... Also,  I thought it may be a story I could share with Malissa once she was old enough to start asking her own questions.  Of course, before we got her I had to assume some events about Malissa's portion of the story based on what little information we were given.   Since that time we have learned a little bit of new information and hopefully we will gain even more through this heritage tour that we are taking.  My plan is to revise the story once we are back home in July.  Maybe Malissa will write her own story.  :)  Here is the story I wrote the summer of 2003...

Many Red Threads

In China it is believed we each have an invisible Red Thread tied to us.  The other end is attached to someone we are destined to love in our life.  It may stretch, even become tangled, but it will never break.  As we get closer to our loved one the red thread untangles and shortens until finally we are with that person.

     This is the story told by a girl born in China who was loved by many people and was attached to many Red Threads.

     I was born on a clear, starry night in the Chinese city of Qinzhou (chin-joe) in the Year of the Horse. I had a Red Thread attached to me that stretched to my birth mother since she loved me very much, but my mother cried sad tears on the day I was born.  She knew she would have to give me to strangers because in China you are supposed to have only one child.  She already had a child.

     A few hours after I was born in the predawn hours on a hot, sticky morning in August she gently bundled my up in a blanket.  She held me closely to her aching heart as she walked down a street where a grassy knoll lay in front of a dance studio.  The tiny lights of the studio marquis which normally twinkled like stars in the night sky were now dark.  She looked around to make sure no one was awake, and with silent tears running down her cheeks she placed me on the ground knowing the people who worked in the markets near the studio would soon walk by.  She softly called out, "Ziajian, baobei, " (bye-bye, baby) as she walked away.  The Red Thread attached to her may stretch, but it will always be there.  

     When the sun soon peaked above the eastern horizon an elderly woman pushing a cart full of yams strolled along the street.  As she neared the grassy knoll she found me sleeping peacefully in the soft grass.  She picked me up, gazed into my tiny pudgy face, and glanced around to see if anyone was near.  No one was to be seen.  The old woman smiled down at me, knowing I was now safe.  She went to a nearby phone booth and called the local police.  When the police officer arrived, he placed me in the police car and drove to the orphanage on the other side of the city.

     At the orphanage the police officer handed me over to the head nanny so I could be named and taken care of until a family was found for me.  The nanny named me Min Ke Xing (min-kuh-sing). Min was my new surname meaning "citizen" because I was now a citizen of the orphanage.  Ke Xing was my given name meaning brilliant star since I was born on a clear, starry night, and because I was found in front of a dance studio with many twinkling lights.

     In the orphanage there were many children.  Some of the children were old enough to go to school. Some of those older children were found as little babies like me, and some were brought to the orphanage later because their parents died.  The room I was taken to was full of little babies like me. Many nannies fed us, bathed us, held us, and loved us.  Our sleeping room held 20 cribs full of babies just like me.  In another part of the orphanage there were rooms full of toys.  We would play, crawl, bounce, and laugh there while listening to music.  I will always have Red Threads attached to my nannies and the other children in the orphanage.

     After being in the orphanage for about a year, one of the nannies held me closely and cried.  She knew she would soon have to give me away, because a family from the other side of the world was coming to get me.  She was sad since she would miss me, but she was also happy because I would soon be part of a loving family.  The nanny dressed me in a red shirt and shorts and wrapped a blanket around me.  While holding me tenderly, she carried me to a bus that was to take thirteen other babies and me to a hotel where many families were waiting for us.  

     My nanny sang to me softly on the hour long bus ride.  I had not been out of the orphanage since the day I was born.  I looked around at the passing trees, hills, rice fields, and buildings.  I listened to sounds I had never heard before.  There was wind rushing in the bus windows, horns blaring, people shouting, and bells clanking.  My eyes were big with wonder.  

The rest is to come in an upcoming blog post...

Why "Many Red Threads" for the name of our blog?

Almost eleven years ago my husband and I opened an email from our adoption agency, Great Wall China Adoption.  In the email was a photo of a beautiful little Chinese girl with big dark eyes and a head topped with a whisper of black hair.  My immediate thought upon seeing her beautiful face was so this is my beautiful daughter who has been tugging at my heart for nearly 18 months!   The Chinese call that tug on our hearts an invisible red thread.  

     The tug on that red thread began for me on my birthday,  January 13, 2002.  I was at my mother's house for dinner when I noticed a magazine on her coffee table called Faith Magazine.  On the cover was a Caucasian woman holding a Chinese baby.  It looked intriguing so I opened up the magazine to read the article.  As I was reading the article about how this woman adopted a child from China, I felt a very strong desire to adopt a little girl from China.  The feeling was overwhelming and brought much peace and conviction into my heart.  

    That evening I told my husband about what I felt.  I think at first he thought it was a fleeting desire and would go away after some time.  That was not the case, though.  I could not think of anything else.  I prayed about it and began to research adoptions from China.  I also contacted several adoption agencies to interview them about the Chinese adoption process and requirements.  My husband soon realized at this point that this was not fleeting and gave the "green light" to start the process.  

    After much paper work, social worker visits, doctor appointments, and jumping through many hoops we were officially waiting for our turn to be appointed a daughter from China.  And, boy did we wait.  Chinese value patience so I think they were teaching us a valuable lesson.   By May of  2003 we were expecting the phone call from our agency telling us we had a daughter, but a nasty viral respiratory disease began to emerge in Asia called SARS.  SARS had become an epidemic and many people were very ill or dying.  China decided to shut down its borders to prevent the spread of the virus, and consequently foreign adoptions would cease until the SARS could be contained.  We were devastated since we were told by our agency we were next in line.  

    Fears of how our little girl was doing began to surface.  Would she be exposed to the virus?  Was she sick right then? Did the orphanage have the means to take care of her if she did get sick?

    Finally, on July 2, 2003 the borders were opened once again, and the following day we received the phone call from our agency.   "Congratulations!  You have a healthy little girl from QinZhou Social Welfare Institute.  We are sending a file to your email with more information and her photo."  We were overjoyed and relieved she was okay.  Of course,  our luck was such that where we were had no internet to open our email, so we raced by car to the closest place we could think of that had internet-my mom's house-and opened up the email to see our daughter's sweet face.  

    On September 11, 2003 (yes, a scary day to be flying) we finally got on an airplane to China and met our daughter in person on September 14, 2003.  

     Our daughter we realized later, was conceived around the time I first saw the Faith magazine and I felt the tug in my heart in January of 2002.  To me this is a pretty strong indicator that the invisible red thread described by the Chinese is a real entity--the love of God.   And since we experience the love of God through many people we are all connected to Many Red Threads!  

     This is the story of our journey to shorten some of those red threads that were established in China eleven years ago as told by myself and my daughter, Malissa.